so archies teacher is really concerned about him. hes behind in his class (of 12), but he had been catching up and now hes taken a dip again. and hes digging his heels in and rejecting all teaching; reading math, all of it. max is close to overtaking him. psychologically, that would be really really bad news for archie. so i have to pull myself together and sort it out. the way ive parented my boys so far has been right and fine enough for the baby stage, but theyre not babies any more and archie needs me to sort it out, take control and be a mum. sandy also agrees that we, he and i, need to do that, and get some structure back into our lives and more control in OUR hands rather than theirs. starting with weekends, he thinks. our weekends, as well as week evenings are ruled by what the children want to do or not do. we 'get through' weekends, rather than living them. not good. SO, united front, sandy and i are going to Pull Ourselves Together and do our best to help our little man who is really a bit terrified of life and how to live it and do it 'right'. the killer for me is; I am a bit terrified of life and how to live it and do it right. How am i supposed to show him how to take control of his own destiny and break things down into small chunks and not get utterly overwhelmed by Life and Monumental Tasks... when i havent the foggiest idea how to do it myself?? fuckadoodledoo.